DOLLARS AND SENSE

Common sense answers to questions on personal finance

by Joe Plemon 

Q:  Help!  My son recently graduated from college and, because he hasn’t found a job in his field of study, moved back home.  He has student loan and other debts.  We want to help him but we also want him to be independent.  Any thoughts? 

A:  After your son has been so focused on completing his degree, there is a danger that he could relax and lose momentum.  Therefore, it is critical that you immediately establish clear expectations.  These hints should help:

·        He needs to work.  Just because he hasn’t found work in his preferred field doesn’t mean he can’t find work.  He is responsible for his debts and he needs to be making payments, even if it means flipping burgers or mowing lawns.  These jobs are temporary while he is also doing job interviews and sending out resumes. 

·        Establish a timetable. He needs to understand that you are not kicking him out, but ensuring that he doesn’t become complacent.  It may be a few weeks or it may be a few months, but if he is honestly pursuing full time work he will find it.  A timetable will help.

·        Have him help around the house.  He is a part of the family, not a house guest.  He should pull his weight accordingly.  Even if he is mowing ten lawns a day and sending out ten resumes a week, he should still help with household chores such as carrying out the trash, carrying in groceries, etc.

·        Encourage him.  He probably doesn’t like the thought of being home any more than you like it.  It would be easy for him to get discouraged if the job doesn’t happen right away, so do your best to help him keep his spirits up as he searches.   Hopefully, this time at home can be a great step toward your son’s independence.   Good communication and clear expectations are essential.